The Weirdest Thing You’ve Ever Carried on a Run

Cinnamon running with a tree
Yep. That is a tree.

There are two types of run out there in Saltyland. Mostly we run just to run; to get the workout done with no distractions. Sometimes though, running can be a super-practical way to multitask. That’s the second type of run: the practical variety. Got an easy jog on the schedule? Combine it with errands for superwoman-style efficiency! Need to transport something from point A to point B? Just run with it and save on gas money or public transportation. Boom! Miles in the bank!

Sassafras has carried a giant trophy on a three mile run. Mango’s run home in work clothes and Chucks, pushing a newly purchased baby jogger through the streets of Boston. Wintergreen once ran home with a case of Perrier, and Cinnamon once ran with a discarded christmas tree. One Saltine jogs to the LRS to pick up and run home with a dozen gels; another regularly picks up and carries home discarded gel wrappers. Just last week I was inspired to jog around the park and then down to the shops to buy random things, including a bottle of wine. That seemed a bit heavy to run with so I took a bus home, but then Sassafras said she’s totally run with wine before (though “only” for half a mile and not at the same time as the giant trophy. Just to clarify.) So I’ll have to step up my run-carry game next time!

We were curious whether other runners do this, or whether running-and-carrying is a Salty-specific phenomenon. Our “highly scientific” Twitter poll revealed that many runners have extremely strong run-carry games. Unsurprisingly, delicious snack items such as wine, sandwiches, and donuts are popular things to carry home on a run. Dog poop, American flags, library books (a dozen at once!?), anything seems to be fair game. Even a dead salamander.

So do you literally run errands? Carry random objects from A to B? What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever carried on a run? Tell us all about it in the comments!

I'm a 43-year-old living in Berlin, Germany and currently training for the 2020 Berlin Marathon.

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