Yesterday was Valentine’s Day. In chilly Utah, we had a 5k advertised as a singles run. My running store hosted a Valentine’s Day Mix n’ Mingle for the unattached runner. Barf.
I didn’t go to the 5k and not just because I don’t run 5ks. I didn’t head to the Mix n’ Mingle. And I said no to a perfectly nice runner who asked me out. Why?
I don’t date runners.
Don’t get me wrong. There are a slew of successful running relationships. It even works well for some. But it’s rare. Better to be safe and NEVER date a runner.
Here’s why.
My non-running Valentine’s Day attire. This girl will never wear running clothes on her dates!
1. Dudes can’t handle you being faster. Like most runner dudes, one of the runners I dated was obsessed with my race times. He was POSITIVE that he should be able to run faster than me because he had one of those pesky Y chromosomes, despite training WAY less than I did. He never did beat my times. And yes, I dumped him.
2. You need a driver and fan club at your races. We deserve our significant other at miles 5, 13, and 20 to cheer us on. And he should smell great and be ready with a hug, water, and some of our favorite treats at the end of the race. If he’s been running too, he’ll be way too focused on himself. Unacceptable! I want ALL the attention on me. Us running goddesses deserve nothing less!
I would never date this man and neither should you (for a variety of reasons). (Photo credit: Tobyotter)
3. Running should be your ME time. I run alone. Just, me, my treadmill, and my iPad. Maybe you run with your girlfriends or with your club. I don’t share my treadmill and you don’t need to share your friends or your alone time.
4. Running dudes won’t worship your runner-ness. Non-runners are always impressed by your latest run. 5 miles? Amazing. 26.2 miles? They think you have magical powers. Your super strong runner’s body is his wonderland and he thinks you’re superwoman for running it there. A runner will just think you’re normal and THAT is unacceptable!
5. Runner guys won’t be quite as amazed at your ability to pack it away. Guys say they love a girl who eats. And runner girls can eat! I don’t order the salad. I order the steak. And potatoes. And dessert.
Now, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention a few things that non-runners don’t understand, but they mostly revolve around missing toenails, the compulsive need to run and the extensive funds spent on running “stuff.” But I’m willing to let that go to date the non-runner.
What do you think? Do you prefer runners or non-runners?
Haha you make some good points. Although I think dating or in my case marrying a casual runner can work. I train seriously, always having a race or goal in mind…my husband does not. He runs with me when I have easy, shorter runs and stays home and makes me dinner when I have longer run. He’s not very interested in racing so he’s always there to support me for my races. It’s a nice balance of someone who shares my interest and who thinks I’m awesome
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That’s a great balance! I think part of my reasoning is that I’m selfish – I like my “me” running time AND I want someone there at the end my race!
Cilantro recently posted..5 Reasons to Never Date a Runner
When I first started dating my husband he was very serious about his running – 100+ mile weeks, etc. But now he runs about 10 miles a week. This works well because he totally gets what I’m going for and going through to get there and he always has great advice! We can run together from time to time, but not very often. When we do it’s special. It’s the best of both worlds :)
Obviously your post is from a woman-runner-with-a-nonrunner-guy perspective. A long-ass time ago I, albeit more weakly, argued the same thing you did, but from (and this’ll shock you) a male standpoint.
http://web.archive.org/web/20010719165753/http://www.coolrunning.com/beck/beck0124.htm
Your #2 matches one of my observations almost perfectly, and your #1 and #4 bear at least some resemblance to my caveats about dating another competitive runner. I’m surprised I didn’t give #3 any conscious consideration myself, and #5 never occurred to me but that’s not a surprise given the typical he-she-food dynamic.
Good stuff, at any rate.
I WAS married to a non-runner. Maybe it was the problem with the relationship but there was some resentment for all the time I spent running. I think he got tired of spending so many weekends at races.
I would love to date a runner. So much more in common and someone to run with, although I understand the alone time. I’m a pretty slow runner, so most that run with me feel pretty speedy!